The Christmas Season

I can honestly say I made good on my decision to really try this Christmas season.

I guess I need to start off by saying that I really don't enjoy going home for the holidays. It inevitably means more work. It means dealing with mixed feelings for my parents, taking care of visiting relatives, preparing meals, and convincing Gramps that it would be better if he would simply let people help him in his old age. I means traveling long hours my car and by plane, late nights, and anxiety.

Yet, this year I took it all in stride and kept reminding myself that how I give service during this time is perhaps more important than the fact that I do.

One of the things I tried to do in increase the quality of the time and the activities we did. On Christmas Eve we read from Isaiah 9:6-7 , Luke 2, and, from the Book of Mormon, 3 Nephi 1. We shared some thoughts about experiences we had and how they shaped our understanding of Christmas, kept it simple, and called it a night.

Sure, I did the normal stuff too like putting up the tree, hanging the stockings with care, putting lights up on the eves, and baking an inordinate amount of food.

Exhibit A: Stockings hung with care

All those things help the house look festive, but the truly important things I wrote down in letters I included in the simple gifts I gave. Its not important what the gifts were - its what they represented. For my younger brother and sister, Steven and Diana, I gave them things that were forward-thinking, that would help them think about the future and measuring-up to the responsibilities that will be theirs. To my parents I gave something that I hoped would help them understand me better since miscommunication is the greatest fault in our family. For my younger brother Trent (Elder Hood), who is serving God and His children in Thailand, I was able to put together a three-way Skype call.

For Gramps, I hosted all the family so that he could be around his children, grandchildren, and new great-grandchild and made a list of things he'd like to do while I'm here in California with him. We went to the greatest park known to man:

Exhibit B: Schabarum Regional Park

to the Los Angeles Temple, viewed the lights,

Exhibit C: Amazing lights

...and toured the new visitors' center:

Exhibit D: I love this!

and, last but certainly not least, I started editing his autobiography.

Now, as things are winding down, I'm reflecting on lessons learned and realizing that the effort everyone made to have quality time, to share sincere thoughts, and simplify the season really payed off.

Funny...Calvin actually understands this lesson too...

What Should You Give?

I've been listening to this Christmas Carol on repeat this past week. I catch myself humming it when I get up in the morning and especially at night when I'm thinking about the Christmas Season.

Its so easy to think about what I'd like to receive or the hassle and money that Christmas costs. This year I'm making an effort to keep it simple and focus on just one gift to one person and giving gifts to family that will help them do the same.

If you don't understand what I mean, this beautiful carol should clear it up:

Spirit of the Season

I've done a lot of thinking about what makes Christmas special. This shouldn't surprise you because, if you know anything about me, its that I think, muse, ponder, daydream, [insert additional synonyms here] a lot.

Last Christmas really highlighted this issue for me. It was the worst Christmas since the time that I lost my wind-up helicopter toy. You know, the kind that you pull the zip cord and it goes flying. Well, it ended up in the neighbors pool. I'm sure that there have been worse ones. A few come to mind, but you can ask me about embarrassing childhood memories some other time.

On a serious note, I returned home for the holidays to Gramps' place. We've lived together for seven years now off and on - between summers, mission, internships, etc. Usually its a great time to sit back and reflect on life. However, that year I was stressing out about a relationship, trying to find gifts last minute for my siblings, and frustrated that more of my old friends weren't around to spend time with.

It only got worse once we showed up at my parents' place on Christmas day and realized that they hadn't prepared Christmas dinner and had nothing planned. It was a little too much for me. Gramps was obliviously basking in the presence of grandchildren. I envied his calm attitude.

I ended up staging a coup of the kitchen and making dinner, planning the time of the phone call to my brother who is on his mission (while the folks sabotaged it by insisting that they were right about the time differential), and getting almost nothing in return.

Let's face it - we all want someone else to take care of Christmas. We want to just sit down, relax, and receive awesome presents. Last Christmas finally broke me of that notion.

Christmas, like most or all things in life, is all about taking ownership. I've struggled with sadness during the holidays, but only when I didn't put any effort into making the season merry. It takes effort to get that holiday spirit. I've decided that "'Tis the season to be jolly" is synonymous with "'Tis the season to be cheesy and cliché" and it is a blast!

I got an advent calendar this year and under each window, instead of chocolate, there is an activity to do. I've been doing those every night. I've got Christmas music playing. I'm home alone most of the time, and it has the potential to be another worst Christmas ever, but only if I let it.

Some people have suggested that its what we give that's more important, but even that has become a vice during Christmastime with trendy toys, must-have fashions, and extravagant decorations.

Where is the Spirit of Christmas we have lost in giving thanks to ourselves for being so giving? Where is the Holiday Cheer we have lost in complexity?

There is only one thing that you can truly give to others and to God. Toys will break. Dinners will not always be perfect. Video games will lose their appeal. Fashion will change. In the words of The Preacher: "All is vanity".

Give your heart.

Give of yourself. Simplify the season. Give gifts that help your loved ones do the same.

Unlike Calvin....

Failure

I've been thinking about this post a lot in the past few weeks. I hope you enjoy it in all its counterintuitive glory.

A month or so ago I was sitting in an economics class when lightning struck my brain. What was this great epiphany, you ask? It was simple really: failure is what makes the world go round.

That's right, folks. Its not money. Not technology. Its definitely not government. Failure is our friend.

Let me explain.

My epiphany came as a result of a discussion on market equilibrium - when the quantity that people want is supplied by the firms in a given market. (Don't worry, I'm not going to bore you with any details. Just bear with me.) My mind drowsily awakened from the spell that had been cast on it from yet another disjointed lecture and perceived that there was more to the story than that suppliers and consume magically coordinate their efforts to produce and consume at some optimal level.

How is this level really found? Its simple really - sometimes a firm doesn't make enough product, or overproduces, isn't efficient enough, etc. and then it dies. If it doesn't, then it reforms in some significant way. Really, the optimal output level is a product of repeated failure.

This, of course, makes sense. You and I, we make decisions. At times, we mess up. We burn our hands on the cookie sheet, so to speak, but we eventually learn how to live more efficiently and avoid negative side effects.

By now you should be rolling your eyes and thinking, "This guy is really dumb. This is obvious." And you would be right in that assumption if I didn't carry the idea one step further.

If failure is so important and leads to optimal behaviors in individuals, firms, markets, governments, etc., what happens when we prevent it from occurring?

(Stop now and re-read the previous paragraph...please.)

With regard to firms, when we prevent failure, we eliminate the signal sent to the rest of the market that it is 1) saturated with firms and there are no profits, or 2) that the behavior is not suboptimal. In other words, we subsidize the inefficiency.

Parents understand this principle very well. (Well, good parents anyway. Yes, that is a judgmental statement. Deal with it.) If you remove the negative consequences to a bad deed, you teach a child that it is okay to continue that behavior.

Government is the same way. This is why republican democracy is the most efficient form of government. We the people identify failure on the part of our elected officials and vote in people we think have learned the lesson and will carry us onward.

One more thing...

If you are a Christian, and more especially so if you are a Mormon, you believe in a pre-earth life and that there was a great conflict there between God and Satan (Job 38:7; Jeremiah 1:5; Luke 10:18; John 8: 58; Revelation 12:4, 7-9). This conflict centered around the plan of God to grant to all man the power to choose for ourselves - to be tested in this life as to whether we would follow Jesus Christ. This is called moral agency. Satan's rebellion centered on revoking that gift and thereby forcing all men to choose only his way. It is my personal opinion that the devil was afraid of failing and therefore sought to implement a different plan whereby he would be assured success. (For more on this and the power of agency: Moses 4:1-4; 2 Nephi 2:27; Mosiah 5:8; Helaman 14:30-31;Note: These references are from what we as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints refer to as "modern scripture").

Essentially, what I am saying, if I am saying anything at all, is that failure is crucial to God's plan. We all are meant to fail, to learn, to realize that it is only through the grace of Christ, by means of His atonement for sin, that our failures can be rectified.

Also, what I am implicitly stating is that failure is an essential process and a true principle in every field be it theology, economics, sociology, etc. What I am also concluding is that denying failure as it should occur as an indicator in: markets, in behavioral development, in government, etc. is nearly always a product of fear and is selfish. It revolves about the idea that somehow we can't learn, won't learn, or around the corruption of private interests.

I believe in the gift of failure and in the ability in the human soul to shape it into the greatest tool we may ever have.

Of course, not all people learn the right lesson from failure...

Death is a Gift

First off, no, I'm not going emo. No, I'm not depressed. I simply want to convince everyone that death is really important.

Society tries so hard to distance itself from death. We put our elderly in nursing homes, romanticize it until it barely resembles reality, and ignore the timeline that it gives us.

In reality, death is the greatest gift of life. Let me explain.

Many of the social ills of our modern world can be solved by embracing the inevitability of death. Ignoring the fact that we have only so much time allows us the luxury of thinking of only the present. However, this mindset is detrimental, as it leads to decisions that do not take into account a future that is much bigger than the lifespan of any one person.

Embracing the reality of death forces us to think of the long-term. I feel that our elderly are, in that sense, perhaps one of our greatest assets as a society. They are not a social ill to be euthanized. They are a reminder of the need to think beyond ourselves. Thinking for the long term - 10, 20, 30 or more years down the road - will prevent excessive debt, promote building family ties, and leads to more sound fiscal and governmental policy. Short-term decisions resulting in short-term fixes to satisfy short-minded people will only result in long-term catastrophe.

I have a hunch that families that have an elderly person living with them will tend to be more successful in life. They will not live for themselves. I think that is perhaps why our puritan forefathers worked hard - not only for "treasures in heaven where moth doth not corrupt nor do thieves break through and steal" - but because they had much shorter life spans and were forced to confront the reality preparing in advance and for their posterity.

I'm sure that this thought could be expressed better, but hopefully you get the gist.

Calvin did...

Regrets

They say that hindsight is 20-20 - that you could have done something differently but as a result of incomplete information you chose a less desirable outcome. I don't think that is what regret is. Regret is being able to see an opportunity to make a choice in the present, to know that you should choose it, and then to fail to do so.

I don't have many regrets. The one's I do I think are pretty significant. They were mostly products of one of three things:

1. fear
2. laziness
3. conceit

While I was growing up I felt entitled to service and goodwill from Church and school leaders. While it was their job I neglected to take ownership of the problems that only I could see because of my unique situation. I may not be directly accountable but I am sorry that all I did was whine. This was really self-centered, or conceited, of me. It is a habit I am glad to say that I have kicked in most ways. I'm sure some clever person is waiting to tell me otherwise.

During my time at BYU I finally managed to overcome the false expectation that beautiful/intelligent/perfect/etc etc women are supposed to be breaking down your door to get to you because you served a mission and do your home teaching every month. Again, a sense of entitlement propagated by well-meaning Church youth leaders that are trying anything to get 16-19 year-old guys, who would rather be playing sports or video games, to care about anything else. I became lazy, didn't date that much, and can very clearly remember some great girls that I really should have just asked out either sooner than I did or at all. Did I really think I was that great of a catch?

It has been said that we often live below our privilege. I heard it again this weekend from a reliable source, and it has caused me to meditate on what my "privileges" are. I have the opportunity to get an amazing education, to socialize with some of the greatest people I may ever meet, to keep my extended family unified as we begin to spread out even more, and the list goes on. While I do well in some areas, what holds me back is fear. Why be afraid to rise to your own full potential? Why self-limit? The answer may be that I fear that I will lose, that I'm not up to the task. To push on is to risk failure. What if I assume the responsibility to be an expert in my field, the link in my family, the friend, the optimist and I'm not good enough? This is the fear that breeds mediocrity. This is why we are so often content with complacency. I think I'm a little better at being fearless, but its mostly because I'm not smart enough most of the time to know my own limits. I keep at things no matter if I have no chance of winning.

Yet, somehow things seem to work out. I think its because of miracles - the hand of God in my life. Some like to think its all chance. All I know is that if I keep going the way I am, I'm not going to have many more regrets.

Unlike poor Calvin...

Grass Stains

I am an avid reader of Calvin and Hobbes. This a favorite:


I went on a hike with a friend over the weekend and was reminded of this when I cut myself climbing a tree. I don't know too many people who are happy to get injured in any way, but I was.

When you have to be inside all day during beautiful Fall weather I suppose that's the kind of mentality you develop.

Just in case you missed the memo

I moved.

I'm in Indiana going to grad school.

Things are good.

A day like many others...

Dear _____,

Today I got up, ran 8 miles, and relaxed in the hot tub. I did my laundry at a leisurely pace and then went to my classes in the afternoon.

I'm a county and state delegate for the Utah GOP, so I got the usual assortment of calls from different folks who, for some reason, want to be elected to office. I met with one candidate and impressed him with my poli sci jargon.

I put new strings on my guitar and ate some really healthy cracker-thingies.

Fin.

One month, two days, and right now

In a month I'll have graduated from college. That's cool.

In two days I'll be 25 and, according to Mormon lore, a menace to society.

Right now I'm writing, reflecting, musing.

Lots has happened in the last few months. I've taken the LSAT, the GRE, applied to grad programs, been through a relationship, learned a good amount of Italian, recovered from a hernia, and developed an unusual and increasing allergic reaction to dairy.

Also, I've been an intern for Utah State Senator Curtis Bramble for the 2010 legislative session. I can honestly say that I have not participated in anything even remotely as rewarding as working closely with Senator Bramble. I consider him a mentor and a friend. (Thanks, Senator.)

Now for some theological-ness:

Many people that I know seem to think that God has some mysterious purpose or lesson for everything that they experience. While true that there are some very specific ways that God tries people - laws of chastity, general morality, sabbath day observance - I think it is a far stretch to say that every experience has some cosmic lesson that we need to discover like some sort of jigsaw puzzle.

Rather, I have come to realize that there is a plan of chaos. You heard me right - the plan of chaos. That sounds paradoxical, but its not. You see, God set the laws that govern the earth and now rests (Yes, I know that this sounds like Deism). We are subject to those laws and to the randomness that exists bounded by those laws. For a chapter or two in the Book of Job, God explains to Job the purpose of Behemoth - the symbol of chaos. Job 40: 19 - "He is the chief of the ways of God".

At least for myself I have found it a more healthy practice to go through one's life experience giving meaning to what happens and not searching for hidden pieces of a puzzle. This suggests taking an active role in the learning process in life.

I'm a firm believer of pulling yourself up by the bootstraps and taking initiative. Act, don't be acted upon. Give meaning to your life, don't wait for some meaning to be thrust upon you.

I will now get off my soapbox.